


just friends

by WattStalf



Series: Femslash February 2017 [12]
Category: Durarara!!
Genre: F/F, Femslash Big Bang Yearly Challenge, Femslash February, general warnings for mika being herself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-12
Packaged: 2018-09-19 16:46:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9450827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WattStalf/pseuds/WattStalf
Summary: Well, I think you're amazing.





	

**Author's Note:**

> look you can't expect me to make miracles

Mika needs Anri as much as Anri needs her, and their friendship is more than just a friendship; for both of them, it is a tool. However, she cares more for the girl in glasses, she thinks, than she could ever care for any other sort of tool.

~X~

Anri wonders sometimes if Mika really needs her, or if, at this point, she could have found any number of people to fill the role better. Even as she's allowing herself to be used, she wonders if she's really just a burden, but then there are times when she knows that her best friend really does need her.

Moments like this, when she's just given up on a boy, when her indomitable will is broken somehow, by something. When her heart is broken, and there is no one else in the world for her to turn to, Anri knows that she's needed.

“It was supposed to be true love,” she wails. “And for me, it was! It was love at first sight! I knew he was the one but he...but he...barely ever even remembered my naaaaaame!”

“You deserve better,” Anri says softly.

“Do you know what he called when he threatened to call the police if I didn't leave him alone? He called me _Haruka_ ,” she says. “Haruka! I know it sounds similar but...but...!” She sobs, burying her face further in her pillow, and Anri doesn't know if it's right for her to want to stroke the other girl's hair right now.

“Harima!” Mika shouts. “How hard is that to remember? I guess I must just be nothing to that guy...”

“Well, I think you're amazing,” Anri replies, her voice barely audible, but Mika hears it all the same and turns her head, looking up at her friend in surprise.

“Anri?”  
“I-I'm sorry!” she quickly apologizes, thinking that she must have said something wrong. Mika, however, smiles.

“You're the amazing one, Anri,” she says. “Honestly, I don't know why I ever bother with idiot boys who don't appreciate me when I have a friend like you!”

Anri doesn't know why she feels such a strange blend of happiness and discomfort, and neither of them realize what starts at that moment.

~X~

Mika decides that this time she's going to wait before falling in love again. She's made that promise to herself several times before, but this time, she really means it. Getting threatened with the police is no joke, after all, and she has to make sure she really gets to know a guy, and whether or not he will appreciate the many ways she shows her affection, before she gets too involved.

In the mean time, she wants to spend time with those who  _really_ matter; in particular, she wants to spend time with her beloved shadow, Anri. She knows that that isn't the best way to think of her closest friend, but that's how their relationship has always been, and she knows that Anri chooses to be her shadow just as much as she chooses to have a shadow. If that's how the two of them are, then that's how they are, and it isn't as if she doesn't  _appreciate_ her shadow of a best friend.

She wants to show her appreciation now, because Anri has been there for her and has been so important to her, for more reasons now than just shadowing her to make her look good. Their friendship is not a false one, as much as it may appear that way, and for now, she decides she doesn't care a bit about falling in love. For now, she just cares about Anri.

~X~

Anri knows that what she feels for her best friend is not normal. She knows that there are feelings buried deep inside of her, fighting to get out, that are not normal. If she were to fully acknowledge these feelings, or if Mika were to find out, somehow, she is certain that it wouldn't end well, but those feelings still exist.

She knows that having feelings like this for anyone is dangerous, and she doesn't want to put anyone, least of all Mika, at that kind of risk, but...even as she fights them for that reason, she knows that her feelings would not be easily accepted, for other reasons. They are supposed to be friends, and only friends...she's so confused, and all she can do is try to bury her feelings a little bit deeper.

~X~

“I haven't been in love for three whole weeks,” announces Mika one day. “Don't you think I'm doing a good job? I told you I wouldn't fall back into that old trap!”

“Yeah,” replies Anri, giving her a small smile. “You're doing great.”

“Well, it's really all thanks to you, you know?” she asks, beaming, and Anri is incredibly taken aback.

“Wh-what do you mean by that?”

“What do you think I mean, silly? I would be so lonely if I didn't have you! Every time I fall in love, I put so much effort into it, and it always gets me nowhere, but then _you're_ here to make me feel better.” She grins at her best friend. “Really, the only person I can count on is you, Anri.”

“Wh- no, don't say that, I haven't...”

“But you have,” she says warmly. “You've done so much for me. Really, Anri. You're amazing!”

It is as she is speaking that Mika starts to realize, but she never falters, and never lets it show on her face.

~X~

Anri knows that she needs Mika too much to push her away over her feelings, and more than that, she knows that Mika needs her. However, she still isn't aware of how much.

~X~

Mika had promised herself that she wasn't going to fall in love for a while, but little did she realize that she already had. Now, she knows that it's too late to turn back and too late to try to squash these feelings; they've been growing so strong, all without her realizing it. And all along, she thought she knew everything about her own heart, but now she is surprised by herself.

After all this time, she never expected to fall in love with her best friend and shadow, with the girl she uses and the girl who uses her, the one who is supposed to make her look good and the one she protects from potential bullying. Never once did she expect this to happen, but now she knows that there's no getting around it; she knows what love feels like, and she knows that she's fallen head over heels for Anri.

Of course, she has a much easier head start with her than she does with most boys. Being best friends and all, she already knows most everything about Anri, right down to where she lives!

 


End file.
